I’m so sorry it’s taken me so long to get out a new blog. Sometimes I experience writers block and am not sure what to write about. Therapeutically, I switch between reading, writing, and coloring.

So something that is new to me. Lately my anxiety and depression has been awful. I have a strong tendency to self harm when I’m upset and that is something I try everything in my power to avoid. I have been on Zoloft (SSRI) since I was 6 and Klonipan (Benzo) since I was about 20. I am done with doctors putting me on more and more medication so they can make money and I can wake up everyday feeling like a zombie and spending my whole day on some kind of auto pilot. I do believe anti-depressants work amazing, but sometimes the dose can be really high and the side effects from prescriptions can suck. I told a psychiatrist that I didn’t want stronger medication because I don’t think my body can handle it. So having a psychiatrist that is into herbal and natural medications he introduced the idea of getting my medical card to medicinally use marijuana. It wasn’t really a shock because there have been numerous doctors that have suggested this to me before.

Now I know half of you are like, “So what? Weed is 100% legal there for recreational use and half the world is moving there because it’s legal. Peanuts have caused more deaths than marijuana” The other half of you are maybe from another generation, or a different group of people saying, “The government says that weed is a schedule 1 drug.” In all honesty everything is a drug, but lets not start comparing Marijuana to Heroine. If you don’t think that Benzonatates aren’t extremely strong drugs that cause vigorous withdraws than you need to start researching. As far as drugs go, what do you think prescription pills are? What do you think about those people that go home and drink themselves into a coma or worse. Now, I’m not saying i’m for this because i’d be lying if I said I didn’t used to smoke it. In the it caused my anxiety to be through the roof. I’m talking panic central. My heart would pound, I would shake, I would tense up and think of pessimistically about everything. Sounds awful right? Why the hell would I do that? As I preceded to tell the psychiatrist this, he asked me if I’ve ever had pure, medicinal Cannabidiol (CBD). I’d never heard of it, only THC, they are both active cannibinoids found in cannabis. CBD is on the medicinal side of weed, so if you were to get your card you’d have options of vaping, smoking, edibles, patches, creams, oil you can cook with, oil you can’t cook with, and even water.  If you get strains that are only CBD you don’t even get “high”.  Cannatonic is popularly prescribed for people with PTSD, depression, anxiety, and bipolar disorder. I’m going to add a picture of a packet I received and CBD will appear in your first column. What you will see is how effective CBD is in comparison to THC when it comes to diabetes (weight loss) and neurological disorders, which are the two categories I suffer most from.


First I will say, I AM against going to a random drug dealers/random person’s house and not knowing what you may or may not get or how it was made. You need to see those ingredients for yourself just like you would at a grocery store so you know that you are not putting anything harmful in your body. I AM against the use of it around children, just like alcohol. I would never talk to a kid, or even a teenager about a subject like this. Secondly, I am NOT against the idea of marijuana itself mostly because if you really think about it, it’s a plant. It grows in nature, it’s not chemically sculpted by human hands. There are people who smoke all day everyday for fun, and there are people that use it for cancer, seizures, and other medical needs.There are places all over Colorado that does sell it for recreation, but is known because they were medical clinic’s before weed was legalized in the state of Colorado.  I am close with many elderly people who use hemp for different things, such as creams for arthritis.  God put plants on this earth and many people turn them into medicine ie. Native American’s.

So  this is something new that I’m being open about when normally I wouldn’t being as we all grew up under the impression that marijuana is some horrible drug to be ashamed of and will cause you all the problems in the world. I, however, was introduced to another side and another theory. That instead of marijuana being the cause, maybe for some it’s a solution.

*I am not saying I use marijuana in this post, I just know the facts.*